Cake and A Marriage Proposal

Today was another very busy day in the life of two American tourists in Paris. We got another early start so that we could head to Versailles, which lies about thirty minutes outside of the city. We took the metro to the train station and then took a train ride to the train depot located about five blocks from Versailles.

We were a little disappointed to learn that the famous Versailles gardens and Marie Antoinette's private quarters were closed due to weather, but we were really eager to get inside the palace. The amount of excess contained in the palace is phenomenal. Since there is no longer a ruling family living in the palace, it has been converted to a tourist attraction, and more importantly, a collection of France's history. Here are some pictures from our visit:

After leaving Versailles, we headed to the Notre Dame Cathedral. This is a gigantic gothic cathedral that is nearly one thousand years old, and they still hold Catholic mass there several times a day. The pictures below can hardly do justice to the sheer size of the cathedral itself. This is where the fictional Hunchback of Notre Dame would climb the tower to ring the bell each day. We walked inside and it was interesting to see the swell of tourists circulating around the church goers. Here are some photos from the cathedral:

It was quite a day. We are finding that most people are willing to help us in our complete ignorance of their language. Particularly in the tourist spots people are most accommodating.

An interesting contrast to last year is that as a general rule, British citizens are rude but their accent gives them a tone of friendliness.

In France, this is not the case.

If someone is displeased or thinks someone an imbecile, they make no attempts to hide it. In fact, the French accent accentuates this. This has been most obvious on the public transportation. This is not directed at the tourists necessarily, but at each other. It is an interesting people watching experience.

Today some pastries were sampled at a bakery that has been in business since the nineteenth century. Marriage was proposed to the pastry selected by Allison. The pastry accepted. Details will be forthcoming.

Tomorrow's plan includes a visit to the Louvre Museum, which should occupy most of the day. We have no delusions about making it through the entire museum.

Tomorrow's forecast: 30 F and mostly cloudy.

Bon soir!

Museums, Monuments and Wrinkle Cream

Today was a great day here in Paris! We got an early start and decided to head to the Orsay Museum first. This is one of the most popular museums in Paris, and holds art from artists like Monet, Van Gogh, Renoir, and the like. So we were very eager to see it.  After a delicious breakfast, we headed out of the hotel. As we exited the front doors, we looked up and it was snowing! A very pretty snow was falling and it was still early enough that the sun wasn't quite up yet. It was a beautiful sight.

We had been given pretty specific instructions on how to get to the Museum, so we felt pretty confident.  We boarded the train and got to our destination stop without any issues, although the odor from yesterday did make another appearance shortly before our destination. We were very glad to exit the metro.

We arrived about 45 minutes before the Museum opened, so we had some time to kill and it was freezing outside. We found a little cafe across the street from the museum and headed inside. Some tea and coffee ordered and we were good to go.

One thing that was noticed in England last year was the plethora of amusing signage. It seems the trend will continue here in France, as the picture illustrates a sign posted on the cash register in the little cafe.  I believe the translation is "Watch Your Dog."  One might wonder why one would bring a dog into an eating establishment in the first place, but there you are.

Once we headed inside the museum, we were amazed at the building. The Museum is an old converted train station and the architecture is amazing. We spent the better part of three hours at the museum and captured some amazing photographs of some wonderful art.

When we were done at the museum, we decided to head over to the Eiffel Tower, as it was not a very long metro ride. However, once we exited the metro at our stop for the Tower, we had about a ten minute walk to actually get there. It was at this point that I came to the conclusion that it is not the cold that kills people; it is the wind. It was only about 25 degrees and with the wind it was likely in the teens. This would prove to be some interesting foreshadowing, because when we arrived at the Eiffel Tower (faces frozen in the last expressions we were able to move them into), we were told that it was closed for the day due to the wind and snow.  We did manage to get some pretty amazing pictures of the tower from the ground. We are planning to try to get to the top another day while we are here.  We were pretty cold at this point and the idea of grabbing some lunch indoors with heat was starting to become very appealing. We headed back to the metro station with the intention of finding some food. As usual, the afternoon was about to get a little weird.

As we waited for the metro, a man approached Laura and started making conversation. I have learned that this is not entirely unusual, particularly when people overhear us talking--they can immediately tell that we are Americans. He began socializing with her and was being very friendly. When the train arrived, he got on with us and continued chatting. It was then that he suggested he and Laura exchange phone numbers. Laura is not enjoying the conversation but is trying to be polite. I am elbowing her as subtly as one can do such a thing, because I am starting to have that feeling that this guy is looking for more than a phone number. She wisely does not give hers, of course, but he writes his down. I then announce "Oh, here's our stop, Laura. We must go." Apparently I have become the cruise director on our trips, and I am usually in charge of the maps. I know very well that this is not our stop but I want to get away from this individual as quickly as possible. As we go to get off the train the man yells that it was nice meeting her and her daughter.

Stop.

This is not the first time, nor the first country in which Laura has been mistaken for my mother. This upsets her a great deal, and she spent an hour later that evening in a store looking for wrinkle cream not available in the US, presumably to combat what she feels is the source of the constant confusion surrounding my parentage.  Her self-esteem was somewhat renewed upon receiving several cat calls later in the evening.

But I digress.

As we waited for the next train, we decided that henceforth, Laura will claim to be Canadian.

Tomorrow we plan to visit Versailles and the Notre Dame Cathedral.

Forecast: 28F and snowing.

Bon soir!

Toothpaste and the Metro

We've made it safely to Paris and checked into the hotel. What a day it has been...we left Phoenix at 10am local time and flew to Houston. We were due to depart around 3:30pm but did not leave Houston until 4:30pm.  The flight to Paris is a nine hour flight, so we were on our way!

As is common in most trips, we began to meet some unusual people immediately. My seatmate on the behemoth plane to Paris informed me that she was from Africa and was going home to see her mother via Paris. We had a lovely conversation, and she also informed me that she was going to pharmacy school.

She seemed normal.

My level of patience with this individual was tested sorely when halfway across the Atlantic she roused me from a Tylenol PM-induced slumber to inquire if I had any toothpaste.

I was not amused.

I informed her that I did not have any toothpaste. Of course, no one goes to France without toothpaste. But I am not one to share such things, and certainly not at this point. She went back to sleep.

I did not.

So I amused myself by taking photos of the screen in front of me, which detailed our journey. It was a bit chilly outside at 35000 feet.

We landed safely in Paris and then went through immigration (yay for stamps in the passport!) and claimed our luggage.

Now here is where the afternoon took a turn for the unsanitary.

We boarded a train that would take us into the heart of the city, as the airport is quite far outside the city to the north. Taking the train into Paris would then allow us to navigate the metro (subway) and get wherever we needed to go within the city.

We felt like we had this part down, since we were such pros by the time we left London last year.

We were wrong.

The train workers are on strike. Which meant that instead of running every ten minutes, we waited about an hour for a train. Of course, we are not the only ones waiting for a train, so by the time one finally came, there were quite a few passengers on it.

At each stop along the way, however, there were more and more passengers added to the train. It was standing room only to begin with and we were clearly violating some kind of fire codes. At about the fourth or fifth stop on our way to the metro station, an extremely foul odor begins to permeate the train. It is unbearable. I am breathing into my scarf and there is still no escaping it. I look at Laura and it appears as though she is a lovely shade of puce.

We are suffering.

In addition to the aromas, I am being accosted on all sides by men and women I do not know. We are so tightly packed that it is not possible to not touch someone else. However, there was one man in particular, who so completely invaded my personal space that he ought to have had the common courtesy of introducing himself and quite possibly purchasing dinner.

Needless to say, we were much relieved to exit the train at our stop and proceed to the metro station.

We had a short ride to our stop, and exited the metro smack dab in the middle of the Champs-Elysses, perhaps the most famous road in the city of Paris. Our hotel is right on this main thoroughfare and it was a short walk to the front door.

Now comes the four-hour-nap portion of the afternoon. Laura and I were feeling the jet lag, so we gave in and racked out. It was a great decision, because we awoke feeling refreshed and ready to do some exploring.

By this time, it was dark, so we bundled up and headed out to walk the Champs-Elysses.

At one end of the Champs-Elysses is the famed Arc de Triomphe, which Napoleon had built as an homage to his perceived awesomeness. It is an architectural wonder, and it looks amazing at night with the lights. We plan to visit it again during the day and hopefully get a closer view.

We are planning our day for tomorrow, and so far the agenda includes shopping, as well as the Eiffel Tower. We will try to visit that at dusk since we have heard that it looks spectacular as it lights up. We are also planning on visiting the Orsay Museum

Tomorrow's forecast: 22 F and snowing.

Au Revoir!

Reflection

As the year 2009 draws to a close, a reflective mood has appeared. A list of lessons learned over the last year and things to be thankful for has been formulating over the last few days, so here it is:

• Traveling for two weeks to England only requires one suitcase, even in the coldest of months. Anything more than one suitcase will simply become irritating as you schlep it around the United Kingdom. 
• Patience is a virtue--to be blatantly disregarded if you have been waiting in an airport for more than five hours.
• Flying first class makes up for the aforementioned lack of patience.
• When you are pretty sure your dog has swallowed something foreign, but you are not sure exactly what that is, it is acceptable to take him to the emergency vet at 2am to ease your mind.
• When the dog above greets you after a long day with a wag of his tail and a kiss, it is completely appropriate for your heart to melt.
  
• Manners are essential and those who do not possess them can piss off.
• A man who does not know you who waits for you in a parking lot with an umbrella when he sees that you do not have one and are struggling with all of your accouterments qualifies for sainthood.
• It is reasonable to have no idea whatsoever what the appeal of NASCAR is.
• Brothers are the best, especially when they grow up to be really good men.
• Tears of relief are acceptable when a friend does your yard work for you without asking and the burden of doing this by yourself is lifted.
• A bullshit threshold that lowers exponentially as age increases is normal.
• A refrigerator that is bare is simply a sign that you are busy, not an indication that you are a terrible grown-up.
• Plants that survive solely because they are on a sprinkler drip system is no reflection on you as a person.
• A dog's snoring is one of the most peaceful sounds on earth.
• It is normal to wonder if you could ever possibly listen to all two thousand songs on your iPod.
• Parents that love and support you no matter what are never to be taken for granted.
• Friends that move into your house so that you can chase your dreams are remarkable and humbling.
• It is acceptable to be a hopeless romantic and believe in the kind of love that has two people holding hands when they're ninety.
• Teaching a child to lock doors for safety will absolutely get you locked out of the house.
• Teaching someone to believe in themselves is fantastic.
• It is fair to expect that people will know the difference between a country and a continent.
• It is always a good idea to buy yourself flowers.
• A Blackberry is an essential part of life.
• It is just fine to buy paper towels at Costco if you are the only person living in your house.
• It is completely normal to rearrange a room full of furniture only to end up with everything in the exact place it was when you started.
• Jeans that fit you like they were made for you are an essential wardrobe component.
• Really cute shoes are worth the suffering.
• Beginning to really believe that second chances are possible is amazing.

Sudafed and Gift Wrapping

Who knew this was such an amazing combo? One of the side effects of Sudafed is apparently the immediate ability to wrap as many gifts as possible in a very short amount of time.

Oz seems pleased with the results.

Emily Post Would Be Appalled

As a frequent traveler, I am unexpectedly amazed at the complete lack of etiquette that people exhibit while doing so. Air transportation is not a novelty at this point; one might assert that it has actually shifted to the category of the mundane. That being said, it is certainly zygotic when compared with common courtesy.

It appears as though some may need a refresher course in this area. Allow me to share some tips:

1. If you are traveling with your immediate, extended and twice-removed family members, kindly have your identification, passport, letter of release from the insane asylum, or permission slip ready for each member of your party before approaching the check-in counter. This makes the fact that you and your party will be taking up half the plane much easier to bear if you quickly get out of the way.

2. Once approaching the security checkpoint, please keep the following tips in mind: everything you have must be examined. Yes, everything. This means your Army-issue tactical belt that you insist on wearing with your jeans will need to come off. Please be assured that your pants will be fine while moving through the short line for x-ray screening. In addition, ladies (or perhaps gentlemen, to be completely inclusive), you must realize that your explanation that your crème foundation is a department store brand that cost $40, and the subsequent hissy fit that follows your being told to discard it because it violates the three-ounce rule will only piss off the people waiting in line behind you.

3. If you approach an airport eatery, be aware that the people who work there probably hate their jobs. Ideally, they should suck it up and be nice. But they won’t. So don’t special order a pizza or cinnamon roll when you can see that they are already made. This will just cause one of these charming employees to spit in your food.

4. Once on the airplane, please find your seat as quickly as possible. While it is oh-so-pleasant to be in a tin can in close proximity to two hundred other people, we are all just as eager as you to socialize. The problem is that we are stuck on an airplane walkway in 110-degree heat and waiting for your slow ass to sit down.

5. If you are inclined to sleep during the flight, please do so silently. Your snoring, while clearly charming to someone at home, is irritating to the aforementioned two hundred people now forced to share your slumber. In addition, if ever in your life someone has mentioned that you snore, believe him or her. Kindly brush your teeth so that when you sit in your seat with your head thrown back in oblivion, the rest of the passengers do not have to smell what you had for lunch.

6. Once in your seat, kindly refrain from thrashing about, if at all possible. Those of us behind you do not appreciate the imminent danger of having our noses broken and are likely to shove you really hard completely accidentally while you are in the midst of sleeping. Please see #5.

7. If you are making a connection, expect that your flight will be late. This almost always happens. Knowing this is half the battle. Shamelessly crawling over children and elderly passengers to claw your way to the door when the plane arrives at the gate is simply bad manners and it makes us want to trip you to slow you down.

8. Please understand that if the shuttle says “Hertz” on the side, it is without a doubt not stopping at the Holiday Inn. This is a stupid question.

Now that you have been briefed, please feel free to employ these tips at your first opportunity.

It's Official

I am the worst excuse for a grown-up ever.

This evening my dinner consisted of a cup of raspberries and a cup of rice.

Not because I am on some weird diet, but rather because this was the best meal I could come up with with the food elements currently in my house.

I wish I could say that this is due to the fact that I am getting ready to do some traveling and I am purposely not buying any food products. But no. My refrigerator is usually pretty bare. Or has condiments that begin to look unsightly simply due to the mere fact that they are never used. It appears as though a bachelor in his mid-twenties lives at my house.

He does not.

If you hear a loud roaring noise in the west valley, don't be alarmed. It's simply one of those C-130 cargo planes used to deliver pallets of food to third world countries making a side trip to my house.

Whose services were no doubt retained by my mother.